Learning to Say NO…in a World that seem to demand a YES!

Our lives really aren’t that stressful….we create a stressful life by always wanting to be the person that comes through…the person that takes on yet another task to do before we go to sleep.  We do it in our studio lives and our homes lives.  People create fires all around us and expect us to put them out for them.  We  train the people around us and our clients to look to us to “save their butts” yet one more time, by always pulling their “bacon on of the fire”.

How many times have clients insisted on a ridiculously short delivery time and once you agreed and stressed out to make it happen…they don’t pick up the order for 2 weeks after it was done?  Your kids come to you and say….”Mom/Dad….I forgot…I need this or that for school tomorrow morning!” and we race around trying to make it happen.  In both cases we are training the people around us to be irresponsible and wait until the last possible second, because we will always save them.  Your child comes to you and says “I forgot we need 35 cupcakes tomorrow in class”…you should tell them there are going to be 35 classmates that are going to be upset when they go hungry!  It’s tough to do, but do you think your child will “forget” again?  If a client needs a rush for an important order, do you think your client will pick it up when it is ready if they pay a $100 rush fee….of course they will and you will be paid for the stress you must go through and most importantly,  they won’t likely do it again.

I think we all feel if we learn to say “NO”….or at least say “Yes with compensation”, our families won’t love us.  If you child needs 35 cupcakes which will take you an hour in a half to make and you don’t want them to be hated by each and every student in the class, make the cupcakes in trade for 90 minutes of hard labor at house work…same result, but much less stressful!  We feel if we tell our clients “NO” or make them pay for putting out their fires, they won’t do business with us again, which isn’t true.  Good clients will respect your time and only ask for special services when needed,  because they will know there is a fee for putting out their fires and chronic problem clients will go else where and lead some other sap to an early grave.  Life and business doesn’t have to be so stressful if you just learn the art of using the word NO!


~ by jeffsmithbooks on January 8, 2011.

One Response to “Learning to Say NO…in a World that seem to demand a YES!”

  1. Hello Jeff,
    I couldn’t agree with you more! I would need a scientific calculator to firue out the number of times between my customers and my daughters have had me stretched in many different directions. Slowly I am learning that the old saying “A lack of planning on your part does not mean an emergency on mine” is true. I remember one wedding couple last year who ALWAYS waited until the last minute to do things, although I would concede that I spent some late nights with them, I also made sure that they were here making decisions along with me. What I noticed is that when they had to invest their time in the project it became alot less frequent. Last but not least I was requested to produce a Wedding Program with only 7 days until the ceremony… I had to have them rushed and charged a small rush fee along with the printers charges which they paid without squeling. We here at the studio always appreciate all the information you share, and help us reflect on when things are seeming at their darkest.

    Michael Adams

    Jeff Smith ROCKS! 🙂

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